PERCEPTION

As the years have passed, I have learned that my perception carries a lot of power in my attitude. My parents raised me to have confidence and a positive self body image and for the most part I have always been able to see my own beauty. Now that I am pushing 30 and am on my second pregnancy, physically a lot has changed. My perception of myself and my body has been challenged and more often than not I struggle with feeling less than. While dating my now husband I weighed roughly 50 pounds less than I do today. I look at this first photo and remember so clearly how self conscious I was of my “fat ankles”. I was choosing an outfit for my bridal shower and as I look back now I realize how askew my perception was.

My husband and I both gained weight after our wedding, mostly because we were just so excited about our new life together. 20 pounds later we found out we were pregnant with our first baby. This next photo is of my daughter and I one month after she was born. A friend took the photos and I was so worried about my “double chin” and “fat arms”. When I look at this photo now I see a happy new mom with an adorable and perfectly squishy newborn. 

And now here I am today, hiking with my baby girl on my back and her little brother kicking around in my belly while my husband holds my hand and listens to my thoughts. I choose now not to listen to the lovely comments of “you’re huge!” and instead focus on the truth. My husband thinks I am beautiful, my daughter adores me, and I am fortunate enough to house my baby boy while he grows and develops. So many women struggle to get pregnant, struggle with breastfeeding, and all the other hard parts of motherhood. I am beyond blessed. So today I choose to focus on what my body is doing instead of what it looks like. My body is strong and so am I.